Riddle Competition Winner Announcement Ceremony

Last night’s star-studded ceremony, which was being held at the Glen Douglas pub in Balmore Road, Glasgow, had to be cancelled because Paolo Nutini stood at the pub doors and said that anybody that tried to walk past him into the bar was getting “fuckin wasted”.

The basketball player Shaq O-Neal thought the wee man was joking and is now in Stobhill Hospital with what doctors describe as “Two Adam’s Apples and a baw in the belly.” We tried to approach Paolo to calm him down but he just kept shouting “Cunts need to know! Cunts need to know!” and so we cancelled the event before there were any other casualties. We don’t know what we’re going to do about this prize now.  Not got a clue.

One Response to “Riddle Competition Winner Announcement Ceremony”

1. PhilWal says:

   August 13, 2009 at 9:55 pm

   How about just announcing the winner on the site?